I just clicked on the link to the Blackburn Challenge and read the guidelines page. It’s a joke, right?
Check it out for yourself:
http://www.blackburnchallenge.com/BCGuidelines.html
According to the guidelines the most important aspect of the race, if it really is a race, is seamanship and good judgment, not winning.
“Safety depends on the seamanship and good judgment of each participant.â€
“Seamanship and good judgment demand that each participant carry or wear a USCG approved PFD…â€
“Seamanship and good judgment strongly suggest that each boat carry a bailer, a compass, a chart and an adequate amount of fluids to prevent dehydration.â€
Good seamanship demands the carrying of a PFD? I think THE LAW requires the carrying of a PFD.
The guidelines also contain statements such as, “Anyone who retires from the race…,†“The Cape Ann Rowing Club hopes sportsmanlike conduct will in every instance prevail. Sportsmanlike conduct precludes any attempt to block an over taking boat. Sportsmanship also requires that competitors find within themselves the mettle to complete the course…â€
There’s also the start and finish lines. The start is at “Straitsmouth Island†and the finish is at “Greasy Pole.â€
It goes without saying that the involvement of something called the “Greasy Pole†explains all the talk of “seamanship.â€
I read the small print at the bottom of the page. Here are some excerpts:
“Your man-servant, shall set in seat one and stroke the boat if his employer should aggravate his tennis elbow or if one of the Kennedys should call to announce that some teenage girls were coming over to “The Cape House†with a case of beer .â€
“All ascots should be tastefully worn as to not impede the rowing of the paddle while still reflecting the stature of its wearer and displaying of his coat-of-arms.â€
“White deck shoes are preferred.â€
“Anyone driving a Jaguar, please have your driver park in the back parking lot. After all, it really is only just a Ford.â€
“During the post sportsmanship competition awards ceremony and finger sandwich banquet, please have your wives utilize the women’s restroom tent for all purging.â€
Those North-East Coasters are a crazy bunch.
Submitted by Kanoe Man on Fri, 06/27/2008 - 5:03pm
"hmmmm....I'm lonely and feel inadequate. If only I could stir up controversy AND be a dick at the same time...."
#1 Fri, 06/27/2008 - 5:15pm
You're sick. Don't clog up our forum with your drivel.
#2 Fri, 06/27/2008 - 5:36pm
I agree. Sometimes even though the dialogue begs for it its better off left alone. Not worth the laugh as thats the Molo Solo of the east coast.
#3 Fri, 06/27/2008 - 8:24pm
I would not call Blackburn the molo solo of the East Coast, its just a race for all water craft with some interesting history. People race in all kinds of boats like dingys for example
#4 Sat, 06/28/2008 - 5:11am
Dude! Did you say ascots are coming back in style? Finally...
#5 Sat, 06/28/2008 - 7:00am
Since when were they out of style?
#6 Sat, 06/28/2008 - 11:58am
-possible best ascot scene ever?
#7 Sat, 06/28/2008 - 1:22pm
maybe if i get an ascot i'll find out where my saliva line is.
#8 Sat, 06/28/2008 - 2:14pm
Sorry 'bout that part, Mcniner. Couldn't find a shorter clip.
#9 Sat, 06/28/2008 - 2:59pm
i've got no problem with the length. in fact, the longer the better.
i was just remarking about the saliva line in the palm reading section of the video.
#10 Sat, 06/28/2008 - 5:03pm
Jim,
That is exactly how I picture the Blackburn Challenge, hundreds of different types of boats, controlled by hundreds of stiff, old-money, ginned up ascot wearers.
I just wouldn’t want to be in an OC-6 that “scratches†someone’s anchor.
#11 Sat, 06/28/2008 - 7:43pm
i only called it the molo of the east coast cuz it seems to be a pretty big deal for them but it seems to be more of a social deal. surf aside, what is their "molo solo"??
#12 Sat, 06/28/2008 - 10:11pm
I'm probably a chump for rising to the bait of the original post, who for all I know was trying to be funny without laughing at the expense of Blackburn and Gloucester, but...
The outrigger division of Blackburn will continue to get more and more competitive as more and more outrigger paddlers enter each year and the best east coast oc-1 paddlers train harder and better to race with the strong west coast and Hawai'i paddlers who are already starting to appear at this race. Most of the people reading this forum would probably recognize several of the names from the 2007 oc-1 results.
The manservant, tennis elbow, Jaguar, and bulimia jokes would be a lot funnier if Gloucester were a lot more like Kennebunkport. But just because Gloucester is in New England doesn't mean there's a lot of old New England money there.
"Glosta" is a lot more like New Bedford and other blue collar New England fishing towns than it is like Nantucket, Martha's Vineyard, or Kennebunkport. Not to dis people who actually sail yachts and wear ascots, but most people who live in Gloucester do neither and are pretty proud of that.
Since the decline of the fishing industry, the median income in Gloucester is probably a lot lower than the median income in the ocpaddler community. So the class- and money-driven jokes in the original post come off as a little cruel.
(Finding cruelty in a joke in a forum post?! This guy must be a newbie).
My guess is that the specificity of the race guidelines exist to help touring kayakers know exactly what they're getting into, and to minimize liability for a long and challenging race.
Nathan Day
(not affiliated with the Blackburn Challenge race committee)
#13 Sun, 06/29/2008 - 3:49am
Blackburn was hardly of he Bar Harbor lockjaw set.
"The event both celebrates and helps to keep alive the story of Howard Blackburn’s desperate mid-winter 1883 rowing of a small fishing dory from the Burgeo Bank fishing grounds to refuge on the south coast of Newfoundland. Blackburn and his dorymate Thomas Welch had become separated from the Gloucester fishing schooner Grace L. Fears during a sudden squall and found themselves nearly sixty miles from the nearest land. Over the course of the ensuing five-day ordeal, Welch would give up and succumb to a merciful death, whereas Blackburn would allow his bare hands to freeze to the shape of the oars, and row until he reached land.
Though Blackburn survived he ultimately suffered the loss of most of his fingers and toes due to frostbite. In spite of his handicap, he later went on to twice sail solo across the Atlantic Ocean, earning himself the title 'The Fingerless Navigator'. His story is told in Joseph E. Garland’s 'Lone Voyager'.?"
Blackburn would have been unknown to Thurston Morton III.
It is indeed a race. Several of the top OC-6 teams on the East Coast compete. Frequently fog is a problem. Fog much of a problem where you paddle? A significant number of the competitors compete solo.
Heck, most of you West Coast Hollywood paddlers don't know what a compass is and don't know knots from mph. Do you know how addled "surferese" sounds to grown-up people? I suppose you will when you're old enough to drive.
~~~~~~~~~~
YankeeHo'okele
"Anyone can steer the ship when the sea is calm" - Syrus Publilius
#14 Sun, 06/29/2008 - 10:52am
"All I need is some tasty waves and a righteous buzz" -Jeff Spicoli
#15 Sun, 06/29/2008 - 11:11am
#16 Sun, 06/29/2008 - 12:34pm
I'm surprised that the double sculls is the class that cleans up. Are the conditions that smooth? Don't see how they can handle any "real ocean" swells or chop.
#17 Sun, 06/29/2008 - 2:41pm
Whoa there YankeeH, that's the kind of talk that got Biggie and 'Pac all shot up!
Why can't we just all admit that the further away from Polynesia that you live, the junker you are at paddling.
Aloha!
#18 Sun, 06/29/2008 - 4:26pm
Goto-
Nice Try-
We know you are from the East coast too. You purposely used the work "junker" instead of "junkier" in order to try to get us to think you are from Hawaii.
#19 Sun, 06/29/2008 - 5:25pm
Also I am wrapping my entire body and canoe in Team USA Olympic Swim wear- Speedo LZR Racer for next year's OC-1 races. You guys and gals are toast. You might as well moth-ball all of your gear, because it is over.
Also if you get act up- I will wrap an old HCRA Malia in Speedo LZR Racer-swimwear and you can design whatever unlimited canoes you want and you will get dusted.
#20 Sun, 06/29/2008 - 5:36pm
Was that guy really cracking on paddlers in Hawaii??
#21 Sun, 06/29/2008 - 8:37pm
"Heck, most of you West Coast Hollywood paddlers don’t know what a compass is and don’t know knots from mph. Do you know how addled “surferese†sounds to grown-up people? I suppose you will when you’re old enough to drive."
love it.. clearing up one set of stereotypes by countering with stupid ass shit.... way to go DUDE... get your facts right before making yourself a fool, oh ocean warrior of the east
#22 Mon, 06/30/2008 - 6:38am
Why do they even sell OCs to people on the east coast? Personally, I would never wear an ascot while paddling.
#23 Mon, 06/30/2008 - 6:57am
Where do they carry their tea and cake on a canoe over there? That shows real talent! And all while hes using his comp ass
#24 Mon, 06/30/2008 - 9:09am
I AM from Hawaii goddammit!
I just don't LIVE there...
...yet.
#25 Mon, 06/30/2008 - 10:50am
You guys are all suffering from east coast envy.... :)
http://maineoutriggerchampionships.blogspot.com/
#26 Mon, 06/30/2008 - 11:10am
Yeah, envy! Thats what we are suffering form over here! Everytime I paddle out and the wind is at my back the surf is up all I think about is how lucky those guys out east are to not have to deal with this annoying wind and these damn waves keep rocking the boat. And dont forget about the damn heat! If only I could run in 50 degree temps it would be so much more comfortable.
all meant in good fun fuzey!
#27 Mon, 06/30/2008 - 11:26am
Is that like chine envy?
#28 Mon, 06/30/2008 - 11:25am
Nathan pretty much said it; Glawstah's an old fishing town with a very distinctive feel of what fishing towns are in today's fishing economy. Haahvid Buffy's with ascots usually just drive right on by to thier summer cottages in Rockport.
In short, aside from the drugs, alcohol, and poverty, there's some good 'ol down to earth seafaring yank's in that town eager to enjoy a good time with friends and outa towners (but ya better be able to handle a good dose of sarcasm, all in good fun).
Pretty decent diversity of craft that paddle/row the 'burn...
Interestingly, for a down-east yankee race they have a photo of OC6's on main page... sensing an identity crisis?
#29 Mon, 06/30/2008 - 11:35am
Goto is from Hawaii, yes. He really likes to let everyone know it 'round here, with his vehicle festooned w/ Hawaiian flag stickers, etc. When he's feeling really insecure about his identity, he likes to break out his malo, a huge fish-hook pendant, and a Hawaiian Warror Helmet so everyone on Lake Washington can marvel at his polynesianality. I guess being a warshingtun haole just isn't cool enough for him.
#30 Mon, 06/30/2008 - 11:49am
Out here we can do major downwinders in almost any direction depending on where the wind is coming from . Each day brings a whole new set of possibilities .
You should come out to Maine to paddle in Summer somtime . it`s the best :)
http://maineoutriggerchampionships.blogspot.com/
#31 Mon, 06/30/2008 - 11:53am
Nathan and JC50 made some great points, but, they didn't address the "Greasy Pole" finish.
Wasn't it Winston Churchill that said the Royal Navy was built on the traditions of "Rum, the lash and sodomy."
Is the "Greasy Pole" an extension of those traditions?
#32 Mon, 06/30/2008 - 4:13pm
who the hell is this goto from hawaii everyone is talking about? the only one i know of lives in wuarshingtunn.
if you need any other proof, notice the tight t-shirts.
jim, you should just plaster your car with lanikai flags.
#33 Mon, 06/30/2008 - 6:01pm
Ah, the greasy pole, yes!
I've seen this pole but never in action. It's a stand out in the water with about a 40' log sticking out horizontally about 15' above the water. During a Summer fair, they grease that thing up and place a flag at the end. Then people take turns trying to walk/climb out the pole to grab the flag.
I google it and found a wikipedia entry, better info than I can provide. Looks like a blast.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Greasy_pole
But, this may not be the kind of pole you're interested in, eh? ;)
#34 Tue, 07/01/2008 - 4:14am
Come to think of it, Dude, we Easterners are partial to ascots.
Here's me, a limp-wristed Yankee, wearing my Northern Alliance ascot in '02 after padding, not paddling, around Bagram. The surf, such as it was, was breaking 400 miles away and me without my sunscreen.
That is not a hydration system on my right hip.It is a perforation system.
I must admit I got my first extensive paddling experience on the West Coast...around Coronado.
~~~~~~~~~~
YankeeHo'okele
"Anyone can steer the ship when the sea is calm" - Syrus Publilius
#35 Tue, 07/01/2008 - 7:32am
Um, what?
#36 Tue, 07/01/2008 - 7:52am
Dude,
OK, it's a (scientific) fact that Navy SEALS are all badass n' stuff, but aren't you guys like, really awesome at killing people, and not necessarily awesome at paddling?
I think the original intent of the ascot comment(s) was to ridicule your paddling abilities, and not force you to have to prove that you could stab, shoot, dismember, perforate, or otherwise kill any of the other posters here.
I'm not positive though - maybe that WAS the original intent. If so, remember that IT WAS NOT ME that said it.
Don't kill goto.
#37 Tue, 07/01/2008 - 8:03am
I will spare your life, Dude.
Some people make a business of being known for nothing. My friends and I are good at paddling on moonless nights, not fast, just forever.
~~~~~~~~~~
YankeeHo'okele
"Anyone can steer the ship when the sea is calm" - Syrus Publilius
"Never underestimate the effectiveness of a P226 9mm perforation system." - night paddler
#38 Tue, 07/01/2008 - 9:11am
real subtle yankee...
you can always create your own division... paddling across the channel in the dark, slitting a throat, and paddle back... first place trophy- a necklace of dried ears... take paddling back to it's roots
#39 Tue, 07/01/2008 - 9:26am
It would sure give new meaning to the expression "adventure racing," don't you think? Of course, we'd only do it on the East Coast and you'd have to wear an ascot to participate.
Could we throw in gold ingots, conflict diamonds, or Colombian emeralds somewhere for just a tad more excitement? Ears don't pay the rent and they stain ascots.
Below, YankeeHo'okele crosses the Liberty finish line and readies for a jewel heist on Fifth Avenue (after hours).
http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1402/864710497_a5b7e3687a.jpg?v=0
~~~~~~~~~~
YankeeHo'okele
"Anyone can steer the ship when the sea is calm" - Syrus Publilius
#40 Tue, 07/01/2008 - 10:30am
No, I was just making fun of ascot wearing, superior acting, John Kerry loving, North-Eastern liberals.
Let me get this right, YankeeHookele, a P226 9mm? Really…? I thought they stopped using them and went back to .45 cal. Everyone knows a 9mm is just a dumbed down .38 special. Wouldn’t you rather have 439 foot pounds of energy at 50 yards with the .45 than 323 with the 9mm? But, I guess some people value capacity over stopping power.
#41 Tue, 07/01/2008 - 4:42pm
Why would a whale hatin', gun lovin', fascist prick like you, Kanoe man, post on our beloved forum? We know you're not a real paddler, son. Go start an argument w/ someone who cares about that crap on the motherfucking Huffington Post or something. That avatar is REALLY getting on my nerves.
#42 Tue, 07/01/2008 - 5:07pm
Sort of got to agree with Jim about the avatar. As paddlers we should have respect for the oceans, including everything living in them.
#43 Tue, 07/01/2008 - 5:36pm
www.seashepherd.org
Kanoeman, make a donation and you shall be forgiven...
#44 Tue, 07/01/2008 - 6:05pm
if i remember correctly jambes, kanoe man's avatar was in response to the super ferry. there were the claims that it was going to hit and kill whales. right k-man? feel free to blast me if i am wrong here.
#45 Tue, 07/01/2008 - 6:29pm
The navy seals did a good job in the big boy iron last year - http://www.ocpaddler.com/files/KKBBC.09.08.07.pdf They managed to come in second to last place, and got beat by every masters crew, and both 18 year old crews.
Keep paddling like that Goto and you won't have to worry about them killing you.
#46 Tue, 07/01/2008 - 6:44pm
Cha Cha Chill!
I have respect for anyone who gets in an OC-6 or OC-1. They are all cool no matter where they paddle.
I hope one day the Blackburn Challenge gets a a huge sponsorship and offers a $50,000 purse and then we will all run to Maine and beg to paddle in the race.
#47 Tue, 07/01/2008 - 7:08pm
The Seals put together a crew? Well, I guess that shouldn't be surprise to anyone. Aren't the Seals trained to work as part of a team with every man trained in to fulfill a specific part of the mission? It makes perfect sense. To be a successful OC-6 crew everyone has to work as a team and apply your skills to which ever seat you paddle in. OC-6 training could be an excellent team building activity for a Seal team.
Also, as for the avatar, if you look closely, you can see the whale was already beached and suffering. Shooting it was the only humanitarian thing to do. It represents a dichotomy between the inhumane use of Navy sonar that causes whale beachings and the unselfish humane action of putting a living creature out of its misery.
As for being a “gun lovin’, fascist prickâ€, the last person to call me that was my mother. She was so proud, as she goose-stepped back into the bunker to sew more swastikas on my jammies.
#48 Tue, 07/01/2008 - 7:22pm
yankee seems a cool enough guy... wasn't sure if kanoe man was just a sarcastic wit like a goto or poops, but based on his body of work has confirmed himself to be a complete asshole...
#49 Tue, 07/01/2008 - 7:27pm
Hey Yankee, way to keep a low profile about your job, training, career, etc. like they taught you to do in school. Right on man, your cool!
#50 Tue, 07/01/2008 - 9:39pm
Kona J, I kind of agree with you.
Anyone who gets in a boat and goes the distance has my respect.
"There is nothing -- absolute NOTHING -- half so much
worth doing as simply messing-about in boats."- Kenneth Grahame's The Wind in the Willows
http://dreadnaughts-bluejackets.com
~~~~~~~~~~
YankeeHo'okele
"Anyone can steer the ship when the sea is calm" - Syrus Publilius
#51 Wed, 07/02/2008 - 1:02am
I never said being a gun lovin' fascist prick was a bad thing! Now if you'll excuse while I pump a few rounds from my Sturmgewehr 44 into a life-size Noam Chomsky target...
#52 Wed, 07/02/2008 - 3:43am
Noam Chomsky? Is he being used as a target on academic grounds or political? Never seen anyone get that worked up over linguistics. And politically, his views are far from extreme.
I think that he paddles.
#53 Wed, 07/02/2008 - 6:08am
5 days until the Blackburn "Greasy Pole" Challenge.
#54 Mon, 07/07/2008 - 8:14pm
The famous greased pole:
http://maineoutriggerchampionships.blogspot.com/
#55 Tue, 07/08/2008 - 4:18am
I wont
#56 Tue, 07/08/2008 - 6:23am